Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak

Artist Bio  

London based textile artist, Deniz Kurdak, has been honing her skills in both hand and machine embroidery since 2016, shortly after her relocation from Istanbul. Originally a theatre designer, Deniz blends her interest in needlework with her visual story-telling skills, which derive from her education at Mimar Sinan Fine Arts University.  

The seeds of her interest in needlework were sown in her childhood, supported and encouraged by her grandmother. She was later gifted a sewing machine, which led her to find her medium in free-motion embroidery and explore the boundaries of needlework.  

With her hometown, Istanbul, being under constant urban and cultural transformation, Deniz’s work is highly influenced by the notions of belonging, roots, culture, architecture and identity. The connection between memories and space -some of which sadly no longer exists today- is the main subject in most of her pieces.

Deniz has taken part in several group exhibitions, and her short animation movies have been screened in many international film festivals, including the highly acclaimed Portobello Film Festival. Formerly an academic member of staff, Deniz has also conducted several workshops in universities in Basel, Tennessee and Istanbul.

Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak

Artist Statement

I draw and paint with thread. A sewing machine is my primary tool. This frees me in my production process by having much less control than a pencil or a brush and having to accept the flaws. Yet, detail is vital to me, and my art is elaborate. I like to depict contradictions, the beautiful and the disturbing, the fragile and the strong.

The subject of my work is generally derived from my background or sometimes my daily life. Being dislocated from my hometown forces me to think a lot about identity, belonging, roots and culture and this hugely shapes my work. Most often, memory and space are my main topics. I believe space and objects have the power to trigger emotions or long-forgotten memories. And I like to embellish this idea. I find inspiration in music, architecture and landscapes or cityscapes.

My working process starts almost instinctively following an impression. Then, I develop it by doing some research and sketches. Later, I draw it onto fabric and stitch through it. Stitching, whether in free-motion embroidery or hand embroidery, has a meditative effect. It lowers one’s heart rate. And as it is such a slow process, I -almost unconsciously- delve deeper into my thoughts and further develop from my starting point. Hence all my work is very personal, indeed.

@kurdakdeniz

Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak

What continues to motivate you to create your work?

You know how babies are when they want to tell you something, but they can’t talk just yet. So, they try to point in the direction of an object and expect you to guess what they need. And if you can’t, they become frustrated. That is precisely how I feel when I can’t or don’t create my work.

I had times when I had to stop doing my own stuff and focus on some other things, and that made me beyond miserable. I feel unhappy and frustrated when I don’t or can’t create. These emotions start building up in me like a pressure cooker. This is simply because my form of speech is taken away from me, making me feel exactly like those desperate babies. I don’t want to feel like that ever again. So, this is my biggest motive for creating my work.

For me, there is no line between work and leisure. My art is not only my form of speech, but it also is my favorite thing to do. I always loved to cut, stick, paint, sew, sculpt and explore as a little girl, and this didn’t change at all. This is still how I play.

Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak

Who or what influences your practice?

My first ever influences were my grandmother and my brother’s flatmate. When I was a child, my grandma used to sew and knit all sorts of wonderful clothes for us and create functional textiles. I loved digging into her button box and used to spend hours playing with her collection of fabrics.  

By the time I was around 14 or 15, my older brother used to share a flat with a cool, young man who was a stage designer. The moment I saw him working I was astonished. He was designing a stall for a fair at that moment and I was absolutely struck by the vast sea of materials he was swimming in. He probably was quite stressed with the deadline and the requests of his clients, but all I could see was a person playing and experimenting rather than working. So, I copied him and studied in the same school and the very same department he did: stage and costume design at Mimar Sinan Fine Arts University in Istanbul. And it was a perfect match for me, as I am always inspired by various materials, objects, and architecture. That is where I was trained to express the essence of a story, a play, a scenario visually rather than vocally.

Moving to London from Istanbul in 2015, I also moved away from designing for theatre and screen. Having to work in a small, carpeted room in our rental flat back then influenced and restricted my work and the materials I used; it directed me to go back to my needle and threads instead of brushes and paint, which could spill and stain. We don’t want any problems with landlords, do we?

As an immigrant, I found myself investigating identity, relationships, roots, and culture, which shape my work. Most often, the relation between memory and space is my main topic. I believe places and objects have the power of triggering a rush of emotions or memories often long past, just like scents do. And I like to embellish this idea.

How would you describe the mood of your work?

I like to depict contradictions, combining the beautiful and the disturbing. I am intrigued by the opposing dynamics such as belonging and alienation, truth and illusion. I am not interested in capturing likenesses or telling stories that have fixed interpretations. Instead, I try to create symbolic work that explores our perceptions of ourselves and the larger culture. I chose objects or places to depict which represent significant parts of my life and thoughts. These are embodiments of who we are, the stories we tell ourselves, the history we chose to pass on.  

I like to reimagine the meanings of cutting, sewing, and mending by adding a concept of emotional repair and rewriting our own stories. Embroidery’s ritualistic and repetitive nature not only marks the time of my making process but also reminisces the functional textiles created by my grandmother and are handed down in my family for generations. See, I don’t believe I can tell you “the mood,” but my work is very personal, therefore erratic.

Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak

What do you feel is the most challenging part of being an artist?

Well, for me, the most challenging part of being an artist is to conquer your inner demons. There lives a very mean critic in my mind and I deal with self-doubt most of the time. That voice is so strong and questions everything I do artistically and can sometimes bring me to a point where I abandon and dislike my work or find it meaningless and ugly. Trying to quiet those demons down is my biggest challenge.

Tell us about something from your creative life that you are particularly proud of.

Hah, not giving in to my demons and instead turning it into something positive to keep improving in general.  

And in particular, a few of my highlights are having two of my works selected by Saatchi Gallery for display on Saatchi Screen, one of my short movies screened at the Portobello Film Festival and another one being nominated for the “Best Film on Disarmament” at A Film for Peace Festival in Medea, Italy.

Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak
Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak
Embroidery by Deniz Kurdak
Deniz Kurdak